Discovering your True Value
When our sense of worth is based on what we "do" rather then who we "are" we become too externally focused. We become overly concerned with what others think of us, and accommodating to the point of bypassing your own needs and limits.
Our achievements and what we provide for others become the primary markers of our worth, and we allowing societal norms, peer and family expectations to determine our choices.
When our attention is focused outwardly we tend to put others needs before our own needs. Anxious about “fitting in”, we have difficulty being authentic and true to ourselves. Our need to see ourselves, and be seen by others, as competent and “together”, causes us to be self-critical, and feel ashamed about our shortcomings.
On the other hand, when our sense of worth is based on our intrinsic qualities such as intelligence, humor, integrity and resourcefulness (regardless of your contribution to the world and how others see you), we are more internally directed.
Becoming more internally directed has nothing to do with being self-absorbed and “doing your own thing” without concern for others. Being self-focused is often misconstrued as selfishness. However, we actually increase our compassion and relate to self and others in healthier ways. When you operate from an internal frame of reference you know yourself from inside out. Your choices are determined according to what is best for you, and you live a life that is based on your terms rather than being pushed around by outside influences.
When our sense of worth is based on what we "do" rather then who we "are" we become too externally focused. We become overly concerned with what others think of us, and accommodating to the point of bypassing your own needs and limits.
Our achievements and what we provide for others become the primary markers of our worth, and we allowing societal norms, peer and family expectations to determine our choices.
When our attention is focused outwardly we tend to put others needs before our own needs. Anxious about “fitting in”, we have difficulty being authentic and true to ourselves. Our need to see ourselves, and be seen by others, as competent and “together”, causes us to be self-critical, and feel ashamed about our shortcomings.
On the other hand, when our sense of worth is based on our intrinsic qualities such as intelligence, humor, integrity and resourcefulness (regardless of your contribution to the world and how others see you), we are more internally directed.
Becoming more internally directed has nothing to do with being self-absorbed and “doing your own thing” without concern for others. Being self-focused is often misconstrued as selfishness. However, we actually increase our compassion and relate to self and others in healthier ways. When you operate from an internal frame of reference you know yourself from inside out. Your choices are determined according to what is best for you, and you live a life that is based on your terms rather than being pushed around by outside influences.