How we take care of ourselves emotionally, physically, at work and away from work, can significantly impact our susceptibility to compassion fatigue and burnout.
Answer the questions below to the best of your knowledge. There is no right or wrong answer. Assign one of these numbers to each one of the questions below:
1. When people get upset, I feel compelled to smooth things out.
2. I am able to listen to others' problems without trying to "fix" them and/or take away their pain.
3. My self-worth is determined by how others perceive me.
4. When I am involved in conflict, I feel it is my fault.
5. I feel guilty when others are disappointed by my actions.
6. When I make a mistake, I tend to be critical of myself, and have difficulty forgiving myself.
7. I usually know how I want other people to treat me.
8. I tell people how I prefer to be treated.
9. I tend to measure my self-worth by my achievements.
10. I feel anxious in most situations involving confrontation.
11. In relationships, it is easier for me to "give" than to "receive".
12. I can be so focused on someone I'm helping that I lose sight of my own perceptions, interests and desires.
13. I view my shortcomings and mistakes as signs of weakness.
14. Many of my interests and values reflect what others expect of me, rather than my own.
15. It is best to not "rock the boat" or "make waves."
16. It is important to put people at ease.
17. It is best not to need others.
18. If I cannot solve a problem, I feel like a failure.
19. I often feel "used up" at the end of the day.
20. I take work home frequently.
21. I can ask for help but only if the situation is serious.
22. I am often willing to sacrifice my needs in order to please others.
23. When faced with uncertainty, I feel that things will get totally out of control.
24. I prefer others to see me as being strong and self-sufficient.
25. In intimate relationships, I am drawn to people who are needy or need me.
26. I have difficulty expressing my differing opinion in the face of an opposing viewpoint.
27. When I say "no," I often feel guilty.
28. When others distance from me, I feel anxious.
29. When listening to someone's problems, I am more aware of their feelings than I am of my own feelings.
30. I find it difficult to stand up for myself and express my feelings when someone treats me in an insensitive manner.
31. I feel anxious when I am not busy.
32. I believe that expressing resentments is wrong.
33. People rely on me for support.
34. I frequently become anxious when I think I've disappointed someone.
35. Work dominates much of my life.
36. I seem to be working harder and accomplishing less.
37. I feel most worthwhile and alive in crisis situations.
38. I have difficulty saying "no" and setting limits.
It is important for you to periodically review your self-care, along with your needs and action plans to meet those needs.
If you find that you responded with a 1 (Very True) to more than 15 of these items, it's definitely time to take a close and careful look at self-care issues.
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